Arrested Development Season Finale

Wow.  What a wonderful way to go out if indeed this was the final night of the landmark television series Arrested Development.  In what was actually four separate episodes shown back to back and concluding with the supposed "season" finale of the show, there were more jokes, side-plots, back stories, and absolutely brilliant humor than I've seen in a long, long time.  I'm already marking this down as my favorite TV show of the year, and we're barely into February.  Nothing will come along to match it.  For that I am sure.  I mean in those final two hours, George Michael and Maeby got married, we traveled to Iraq, Buster was in a coma, Justine Bateman tried to do it with her real-life brother, Lindsay tried to do it with her on-screen brother, Gob did it with his nephew's ex-girlfriend Ann (her?), Anyoung returns, Judge Reinhold appears, Pete Rose dives "head first", and of course, the immortal Franklin is resurrected from the dead.  The show was truly chock full of inside jokes that probably made little sense to casual viewers of the program, but for someone who just spent the last month watching the first two seasons on DVD, it was hella fucking hilarious.  Please Showtime, please... pick up this series!!!   

    "My religious girlfriend just dumped me and for a simple little misunderstanding.  I mean, if     someone was always asking you to embrace the Holy Trinity, what would you think it meant?" - Gob Bluth (Will Arnett, the funniest man on television)

      

    Gob: "The real problem is she keeps saying that God is gonna show me a sign - the 'something' of my ways... wisdom?"
     Michael: "Yeah, it's probably wisdom."

 The first episode of the four on the evening was definitely the weakest, involving a rather lame sendup of jury shows and crime melodrama featuring Judge Reinhold as a judge that was mostly boring any time Gob wasn't on the screen.  Buster did lapse into a fake coma in order to avoid testifying at his father's trial, and George Michael got the chance to fulfill his dreams by "marrying" his cousin Maeby in a mock ceremony for the senior citizens of the hospital that turns out to be real.  A little too real for Maeby.  At first at least.

    The second episode is a home run, though.  A complete masterpiece featuring Justine Bateman as possibly Michael's heretofore unknown long-lost sister.   

    Michael: "Gob, let me ask you a question - do you remember growing up with a sister?"
    Gob: (staring at his sister Lindsay) "A sister? No, I don't - not really ringing any bells."
    Michael: "Other than Lindsay of course."
    Gob: "Oh!  Lindsay, of course!"
    Michael: "You know, you might not be the most reputable source on this."

Michael eventually meets the woman whom he believes to be his sister "Nellie", as played by his real-life sister, who he hires as a "consultant" for the Bluth company, although she turns out to be a prostitute (Michael thought "Conslutant" was a typo).  And she has "blown them all [away]."   

    Michael: "And what you do for a job is not a really good way to make a living."
    Nellie: "I make 300 grand a year."
    Michael: "Marry me!  Oh... that's weird on so many levels."

Of course, it turns out that they aren't related, but the reason why doesn't become evident until an episode or two later.  We do learn Gob's relationship with "Nellie", though.   

    Gob: "I am not a pimp, Michael.  She needed protection, so I made some threats, I wear this [pimp] hat, and I make 10%."
    Michael: (flatly) "Yeah, that's a pimp."

It was a truly classic episode.  Since I have it TiVo'd I imagine I'll watch it several dozen times in the next couple months, while the rest of America keeps tuning in for Skating with Celebrities and Dancing with Has-Been Washed-Up Former Actors (and who the fuck is watching people fucking dance in the first place?!)  Ugh.  I hate people.

The third episode takes place in Iraq, where Gob is imprisoned for burning a bush in his magic act that incites a riot to "burn Bush", and we eventually find the doppelganger for the Bluth model home in California, which in Iraq is filled with out-of-work Saddam Hussein impersonators.  It's a pretty funny sequence, and eventually leads to the conclusion of the three-year-long storyline about George Sr.'s alleged treason that led to the whole title of the series, in an admittedly cheap and hasty way, but hey it's a comedy, it's hilarious, and of course, there's still Gob.   

    "Maybe you don't have enough RAM to know this, Michael, but there's such a thing as brotherly love. (notices his brother Buster is there and looks at him with scorn)  What's he doing here?  I thought he was in a coma."

The final episode of the night, season, and probably series mirrors the very first episode of the show, right down to the opening sequence where Michael and his son wake up in pajamas, and a very similar conversation ensues.   

    Michael: "What do I always say is the most important thing?"
    George Michael: "Family."
    Michael: "I was gonna say 'breakfast' but... why don't we go over to Gangi's, have a little bit of both, and then we can talk all this out."
    George Michael: "Well, I've heard that a couple times too."

Eventually George Michael does finally reveal the secret that's been haunting him for 53 episodes, that he's in love with his cousin (and now wife) Maeby.  Michael is disgusted, but it turns out that there's a loophole, in another shocking discovery in a night chock-full of them.  Lindsay is not in fact Michael's twin sister, but rather his older sister (the one he saw in the pictures and thought was "Nellie") who was actually adopted, meaning that George Michael and Maeby were not blood relatives all the times they'd been making out recently.  Although it's probably still incest.  Michael confronts his mother about the secret of his sister.   

    Lucille: "We loved her just as much as any of you normal kids -- more than Gob!"

Some other secrets are revealed as well, such as the long-wondered whereabouts of Gob's residence, and just how much power Lucille has in the family business.   

    Michael: "So it's embezzlement, bribery, and conspiracy?"
    Lucille: "And a whole lotta love."
    Michael: "Oh right, and perjury."

And eventually a celebration on a boat - similar to the one that the series opened with - is planned, in honor of the company stock moving from a "Don't Buy" status to "Risky" (which was accompanied by an apparently failed Risky Business skit at the office that we don't get to witness, but is hopefully on the DVD).  This also gives Tobias the opportunity for one final homosexual-laden reference is a series filled with them.   

    Tobias: "Although perhaps I should call the Hot Lips and come up with something more nautically themed.. Hot Sailors... or better yet, Hot Sea--"
    Michael: (interrupting to stop the end of the sentence) "I -- I think I like 'Hot Sailors'"
    Tobias: "Mmmm... me too."

And then the celebration on the boat is marred by police sirens and the arrival of the SEC, just like in the series opener ("they still have boats?") which is followed by a chase, a cliffhanger, and a storyline for next season, if this show ever continues (on another network obviously).  Last I read, Showtime was absolutely willing to pick up the program, but creator Mitch Hurwitz was questioning whether he wanted to continue, lamenting the long production hours and editing process that goes into each brilliant episode.  And reading between the lines, Showtime probably isn't going to be able to pay all that much for all that effort. 

So it's probably the end.  I hate to see it, I really do, and 53 episodes do not feel like nearly enough.  But there's nothing that can really be done about it now.  I'll miss the Bluths.  I'll miss the insanity.  I'll miss the humor.  I'll miss the guest stars.  I'll miss Lucille and Buster and Lindsay and George Michael and Maeby and George Sr.  I'll miss Tobias.  I'll miss Franklin.  I'll miss Michael.  And I'll miss Gob most of all.

    Michael: "Well maybe she just wasn't for you."

    Gob: "Which one?"

    Michael: "I don't know, I really wasn't paying attention."

Sadly, neither was the rest of America.

Comments

[LegFuJohnson]

If you saw Stacy Kiebler, they'd you'd know why people are watching the dancing show. (at least the guys, anyway)

[chanel 2.55]

"Part of [achieving your dream is] not being afraid to take risks. I took a year off school [for the Olympics]. There were times when it was really hard. Just keep believin', keep truckin'."

— Elle Logan, rowing